Saturday, April 19, 2008

When Does Denial End?

Yesterday I thought about how maybe Jim never died, maybe he never retired from the Air Force. Maybe he became OSI and has been working undercover, only posing as a contractor. Maybe he is on some special assignment somewhere and he is about to return and the assignment was classified and that is why he couldn't tell Tracy or mom or me where he was going.

Yeah, that is it.

Then, as these crazy thoughts were going through my head a parallel thought process was arguing. "No, you watched him die". "You watched him get sicker and sicker". "He is dead, remember?"

"He will never come back".

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